Coming Clean
by DogwoodTreesAndBumblebees
Summary: Perfect, was not perfect. We hid for so long. Hid from the things that were always there. But when it came back down to that night. The rain was the only thing to wash us of those things that we were and were not. -Twincest- -not smutt-
1. It’s only illegal if you get caught

**Hey everyone! I'm WAYY sorry for not posting anything as of late. Apparently depression and Writers block seem to go hand in hand… *sigh* what can you do?**

**right! This is inspired by Hillary Duff's Come Clean. A nice little song, when I heard it I thought of The Twins. It's not from either's point of view. Take it as you will.**  
**I wanted it to sound like I was talking from both of them.**  
**Go ahead and drop a review (please!!!!) and tell me a) what you thought of the story, b) if I succeeded in my narrative (if it sounded like them or if it sounded like someone trying to sound like them, get my drift?) and c) who you thought was speaking.**

**Also, thanks so much to Vanessa Aka ..X . Silent . Lover .X.. (or something like that. look her up on my Fave Authors list if you can't find her...) for the great help with the fic!**

**Thanks so much!**  
**Hannah.**

* * *

Let's go back.  
Go back to the Beginning, Back to the beginning of it all.

When the earth, the sun and the stars all aligned.

But I wonder, can you go back all the way? Is it possible?  
Possible to go back all the way?

I don't think so.

How do you start at the beginning when there really wasn't one?

That and I'd really _not _like to go into the gory details of how my Mom and Father _"consummated"_ their marriage. *Shudders*

But my point still stands.

There really wasn't a beginning.

It just always _was. _  
It started out as nothing wrong, or gross, or fantastic.

At first it was a hand to hold in a bright new world.

Then it was someone to sleep by when you couldn't trust anyone else.

When it was a warm body in the midst of a thunderstorm.

When it was an understanding note when mom wasn't being fair when she said we couldn't paint the tree in the back yard purple (even though that would have been really really really cool.)

When it was a solid body standing next to us as we ran the gauntlet.

When no one gave a shit about us and the jeers and hits were coming at us at all angles.

And really, it was there at the good times too, it was there when we made our success, or when people were all around us, waiting for our attention.

You'd think it was all perfect I guess.

But perfect didn't feel so perfect.

It was like we were trying to fit a square into a circle.

We ran from it for so long.

We thought it was wrong, thought that it was gross or something, I don't know.

But it really wasn't a life, a way to live.

We defied.

I remember the first time it happened.

The first time we ever even_ thought _to accept it as truth.

When we knew that we both felt that way.

I mean, it wasn't like we thought the other one didn't feel that way, we always know what each other are feeling, always.

But we didn't want anyone to find out, 'cause you're not saposta feel this way, about your own brother, about your own twin.

We might even get thrown in jail, although I'm not sure if it's illegal _per say._

If anything caught on to anyone else, we'd be done for.

There've been rumors for ages, since the very beginning, sometimes we think it's funny that they caught on before we really did.

But I guess, if you think about it.

But when it came down, came down to that night, alone in the hotel room, the lights off the air humid, we finally broke down.

It wasn't easy, I can tell you that much.

It was hard as hell, 'cause we'd run from it for so long, known how _not _to act around each other.

We were both pretty miserable, I think it was because the other was miserable that we felt even more miserable, does that make any sense?

I don't think it will… Not like much of this will make sense to you.

You probably (even if you are a twin, which I don't think is true) don't even understand what I'm talking about or have been talking about for the last two pages.

But I guess I just have to continue, 'cause now that I've started I don't think I can stop.

You know what I mean? Like the water has finally broken free of the dam, and no matter what, that water's gonna rush out. Idk, it's weird.

Any way where was I? oh yeah. The hotel room.

So we were in the hotel room.

Georg had cracked a joke earlier and Gustav had laughed.

But we both were thinking the same thing.

And by the time that we got to the hotel, we were still thinking about the same thing, we hadn't stopped really it had always been on our minds, I swear, it's like the fucking subject was ALWAYS there ugh, I don't know why, it's really really really really really really REALLY damn aggravating when you've got that one sexy God on your mind, even if he does look _just. Like. You. _

He was standing by the window, and I was sitting on the bed.

The silence was so loud that it made my head hurt.

We were ready for bed, been for ages, we hadn't even talked to each other.  
Not that we needed to, we had that same thoughts running through our heads, we knew that, it was sad how much we wanted this, but that we were both so much of a coward that we couldn't say it out loud.

Hell, I don't think we even really said it in our head. I guess we thought that if we said it our really thought it that something would change.

And we were right, 'cause after we started thinking about it there was no turning back.

That was the night we thought about it…


	2. Oh the dialog…

"I can't do this."

"I never could…"

"But I just don't know…"

"What's not to know?"

"But I get where you're coming from."

"Of course you do, you've been there too."

"I guess…"

"I don't want to feel like this…"

"What do you mean you don't want to feel like this?!"

"No! that's not what I meant!"

"Oh then what did you mean?"

"I meant – I – oh fuck…"

"You meant you love me but you don't want to have to hide it. You don't want to have to not be yourself."

"Yeah… that's it. How did you know?"

"…"

"Oh, yeah…"

"So what are we going to do about it?"

"What do you mean?"

_"I mean…._If we both feel this way, then what's the point in ignoring it?"

"What's the point!?! What's the point?! We could get arrested, we could get shunned, everyone will be disgusted in us! Mom will be upset, think she did something wrong – Georg will crack some joke like '_I always knew you too were in cahoots …–,"_

"In that voice?"

"YES IN THAT VOICE!"

"Dude, relax, I said ignore it, not hide it… There's a difference you Dummkopf…"

"Whatever…"

"The question still stands, what are we going to do about it…?"

"I don't know I mean I guess we could talk about it, think about it I mean, what else is there to do? I mean it's not like we can talk about it to anyone well that's not true there's always Don and Dean 'cause you know those two are in _cahoots _with each other the only thing with talking to them is they'd prolly want some big giant fake leather orgy with lots of whipped cream I mean I'm not THAT gay hell I'm not even Gay I just have a thing for my brother what do they call that twinsexual…twincest….I.H.A.T.F.M.T.B.E.T.I.G.A.D….?"

"I have a thing for my twin brother even though it's gross and disgusting?"

"How ever did you guess? UGH! GOD! I just want to die! This is ridiculous, WHY DID WE HAVE TO BE SUCH GOOD ROCKSTARS? WHY COULDN'T WE HAVE JUST GONE ON WITH A HORRIBLY BORING LIFE IN LOITSCHE? WE COULD HAVE DONE IT! UGHHH and then the whole thing with the –," 

…………

_"Shirt.... Off…. Now…."_


	3. Filthy rain

Our bodies were so close we were sure we'd just melt into each other.

Things were right. As right as they'd ever be.  
Where we were, no one could touch us.

For a moment, we weren't thinking about how what other people thought what others felt about us.

It was right.

We were trying to find a pigment of truth, beneath our skin…  
The skin we had worn for so long.

It was different. But different didn't feel so different.

We felt the wind, and we were in heaven.

"Let the rain fall down…" We thought.

And it did, the rain fell and it washed away any sanity we had left.

Our dreams were awakened.

__

_"Cause I wanna feel the thunder, I wanna scream, let the rain fall down…"_

We were coming clean, clean of all the things we had been so wrong about since the very beginning.

____

(Even if we did get a bit…._dirty…_ in the process…)

**Ende.**


End file.
